I’m not hating on people who ask you to donate to third world charities on the street, but I don’t need a hippy version of Sally Struthers telling me I’m ignoring the world when I’m at Potbelly trying to get a cheap lunch.
I mean is this it? Is this your contribution to the world? Begging? Acting like a homeless person as you use your parents trust fund like a safety net? Oh what's that? You're helping the world. No, you're an asshole who's acting like an official homeless guy. Would you like a comparison? Sure.
Homeless People ask for help. That's you.
Homeless people prey on your guilt. SOOOO you.
Homeless People stink. And so do you. Take a bath hippie!
Let’s be honest on what you really are, someone who's made some really bad life choices and you’re trying to make up for it by trying to answer a “WANT TO MAKE QUICK MONEY?” ad, aren't you? You are. You skimmed over all the real jobs that take real work. Not qualified to be a waiter, let alone a barista. That drug test won’t allow you in the post office. And temp work? HA! They haven’t called you back since you handed in your patchouli scented resume'!
So begging it is.
Why don’t you get your hippy minds together and think of a better idea? Why don’t you…start a commercial. Yeah, a commercial where instead of pictures you can show actual videos of people in their desperate state. Maybe you can get someone famous like….um….Sally Struthers? Is she still doing that commercial for that trade school? Fuck it, she has time. Then you can send actual letters from the children telling them that their .75 cents a month is really doing some good.
Okay wait is that idea already taken? I think it is. So it's almost like you're doing a harder, less effective, and more annoying version of something that already exists? I'm not hating, but that's pretty fucking stupid.
Seriously. I'm not hating, just saying.
Wednesday, September 10, 2008
People Who Ask You to Donate to Third World Charities on the Street
Posted by Seaton Smith at 3:58 PM
Labels: begging, hippies, homeless, Sally Struthers, starving kids
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3 comments:
Not hating but some people have a gift. Some people can work hard and get a decent wage for their sweat (not literally) other people though help them spend that money. You know how really rich people have personal shoppers. They pick out clothes for people with more money than tastes and they take a percentage. Why can't their be people who are like that only with morals. What if there's a guy with way too much money? He's just looking to give some away because he sort of figured that his kids would give his life meaning but that's not working out so well because his fat daughter is way too into ballet. He used to go to her little recitals but now it's embarrassing. You know that feeling where you pretend to love someone because your pretty sure your supposed to. And your not a quitter. Yeah that feeling, the present you get for your seventh wedding anniversary.
What I'm trying to say is maybe there is a guy that is good at doing things that are useful for other people, but maybe he's dead inside or something. I don't mean to be sexist here either. It could be a woman. Not realistically, but in theory. It could be a woman. She would probably refer to her dogs as her children. You know. One of those.
But this useful guy he might want to buy a boat. Maybe he's got this idea in his head like the words to a song "fuck it/ I'm buying a boat"
But the boat won't make him happy. Not like, um, less AIDS maybe will. We need people in the world to keep people from buying a boat, so that we can have money for less AIDS maybe. Just saying
Now I get it! This is the american Entrepreneur which is the backbone of the American Economy that John McCain is talking about! Not to be confused with John McBride, of course.
These people basically are getting money to make their own salary because most of the money they collect goes to 'administrative costs'.
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